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Ah, this is the life. Wind in your hair and a BIG WEAPON IN YOUR HANDS!
— Captain Ash

Captain Ash is a flamboyant world traveler, known for his prim and proper demeanor, thick British accent, and steadfast ability to get any task done. In his youth, Ash served in the British Army during the Boer War, and the R.A.F. during World War I. Although a skilled soldier, Ash decided to retire from the military life and took up a role as an explorer, delving into the uncharted wilderness of Central America, and the ancient ruins of the Egyptian desert. Ash often gets into trouble with his gung-ho methods, and has encountered more than his fair share of the supernatural. Even so, Ash never bats an eye at danger, and always believes in being a proper gentleman to his friends and foes.

Battle vs. Jack Sparrow (by CuchulainSetanta)

Captain Jack: Red Red Red Red Red
Captain Ash: Blue Blue Blue Blue Blue


Captain Ash and four members of an expedition team are in a longboat, rowing to the shore of a tropical island. They get to shore and head inland, failing to notice a second, empty longboat also on the beach. Meanwhile, Captain Jack Sparrow and four crew-members are sitting in a campsite, drinking and talking amongst themselves. One crewman hears something in the bushes, grabs his musket, and goes to check it out.


Seeing Ash's team approaching, the pirate fires, killing one of Ash's men. Blue The pirate tries to reload, but Ash opens fire with a K-SMG, spraying the attacker with lead. Red Alerted by the gunfire, Jack and the remaining pirates get their weapons and head off into the jungle. Ash's team reaches the pirate camp, which is apparently abandoned. Suddenly, a pirate rushes out with a boarding pike, and stabs one of the team. Blue The man nearest shoots the pirate with his blunderbuss, but the remaining team-members are shaken. Red Ash cheers up his men, and they head off into the jungle.


Coming upon an abandoned mill, Jack and the two remaining pirates set up an ambush. One of the pirates lays in wait by the entrance. As Ash's team approaches, he shoots at them with his pistol, but misses. Ash and his crew fire back with K-SMGs and Kruger 9mms, but have similar luck. Ash readies his flare gun and fires at the doorway. The pirate sees the flare streaking towards him and yells, but he is too late. Red Ash and his team move in and find another pirate at the top of a flight of stairs. The pirate shoots and kills one man, and pins down Ash and the other. Blue Thinking quickly, Ash straps some dynamite to the bottom of the staircase. They flee as the dynamite explodes, taking out the pirate. Red


Thinking they have killed all the pirates, Ash and the final remaining man head back to the longboat. As they arrive, however, they are confronted by a nasty surprise...a lit grenado in their boat. It explodes, taking out the final member of Ash's team. Blue Ash, who was further away from the boat, survives the blast, but is left dazed. Laying on his back, he reaches for his Kruger 9mm, but a boot pins down his arm. Ash looks up to see Jack grin, before the pirate captain stabs his cutlass into Ash's heart. Blue Jack takes a bottle of rum from his belt, uncorks it, and drinks before heading back to his own longboat.

Expert's Opinion

Captain Ash, while not very well known, got more than a few votes due to his modern weapons and military background. However, Jack's supporters believed that the pirate had his cunning in his favor, and would have surprises that Ash simply couldn't match.

To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.

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