| “ | We Zandes kill. We don't have time to take you back to camp. That's not our purpose when we go into battle. Our purpose is to take you out.
— Gordon Jock, Zande authority and Expert on Deadliest Warrior
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” |
The Zande Tribe is a native African tribe in Central Africa.
Battle vs. Zulu Warrior (by KevlarNinja)
Out on the Savannah, a Zulu is resting on a rock, when suddenly, a Kpinga flys by his head. He looks and sees a Zande on top of a nearby hill, yelling. The Zulu responds by throwing a Isijula, which misses the Zande. Both warriors start to charge towards each other. The Zande fires some arrows, but the Zulu stops them with his shield. As they get closer, the Zande tries to stab with his Makrigga, but it get's stuk in the shield and the zulu cuts it in half with his axe. The Zulu tries to stab with his Iklwa, but only scrapes the Zande on the arm. The Zulu then takes a swing with his axe, to which the Zande dodges, causeing the axe to get stuck in an Acacia tree. The Zulu then wacks the Zande on the head with his Iwisa, knocking the Zande out. Thinking he killed the Zande, he shouts "ZuLU! Zul-U! ZULU!". The Zande than gets back up and decapitates the Zulu with his Makraka. The Zande then yells in (real) victory.
Winner: Zande Warrior
Expert's Opinion
The more advanced weapons of the Zande warrior, as well as their higher capacity for inflicting damage, contributed to his victory over the Zulu.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs. Egyptian Warrior (by Wassboss)
An Egyptian warrior is training with his bow in an open field. Suddenly an arrow hits him square in the chest. Fortunately his armour stops it from penetrating his skin. He pulls it out and looks in the direction of the arrow. He sees a Zande warrior standing on top of a hill bow ready to fire again.
The Egyptian aims his own bow and fires hitting the zande in the side. The zande growls and pulls out the arrow and puts down his bow and pulls out his kpinga. He charges at the egyptian who fires another arrow. This time however the zande blocks it with his shield and carries on running. Once he is in the throwing range of the kpinga he throws it but the egyptian holds up his shield.
The kpinga curves around the shield and hits the egyptian in the chest but once again his armour protects him from injury. He pulls out his spear and thrusts it forward but the zande jumps out of the way and pulls out his own spear. He thrusts his makrigga into the egyptian penetrating his armour and leaving a nasty wound in his leg. The egyptian roars in pain and discards his spear for his khopesh and slashes the zande’s arm.
The zande is undeterred and thrusts forward but this time the egyptian blocks with his shield. He then slices it in two with the khopesh. The zande pulls out his makraka and the two warriors begin to duel. Despite having the shorter blade the zande manages to get the upper hand and disarms the zande by hooking the khopesh out of his hands and throwing it aside.
The egyptian pulls out his last remaining weapon, the dagger, and waits for the zande to make the first move. The zande starts off with an over head swing but quickly changes it into an under arm stab confusing the egyptian and scoring a hit on his already injured leg. The egyptian cries in pain and the zande tries to decapitate him. The egyptian ducks under the swing and stabs the zande in the stomach.
The zande coughs up blood and the egyptian yanks the dagger up cutting through the zande’s left lung and slicing his heart. The zande collapses and dies. The egyptian shouts in victory and limps off to get help for his leg. Winner Egyptian warrior
Expert’s Opinion
The Egyptian won because his armour stopped the arrows from penetrating his skin and once in close range he dominated the Zande.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs. Samurai, Persian Immortal, and Highlander (by Samurai234)
In a field, a Samurai is meditating, unaware a Zande Warrior is watching him. Suddenly, the Samurai hears some noise. Wondering what it is, the Samurai grabs his Weapons and goes to investigate. He find the noises are coming from a Persian Immortal and a Highlander engaged in battle. The Highlander throws his Ball and at the Persian who rolls under it. The Persian grabs his Bow and Arrow and fires at the Highlander. The Samurai pulls out his Yumi and fires 2 arrows at the both the Persian and Highlander. He is about to fire a third, but another arrow hits him in the Helmet. They all turn to see the Zande Warrior holding his Botto and Pima. Realizing the weapon wouldn't do good against the warrior's armor, He pulls out his Kpinga and charges at the Immortal. As they close in, the Zande hurls his weapon at the Persian. He puts his shield to block the projectile, but it ends up rotating away from the shield and hitting the Persian in the chest, chipping his armor. The Persian Tries to get up, but the Zande comes in with his Makrigga and he thrusts into the Persian's shield, disarming him. The Persian unsheathes his Sword and slashes at the barbed spear, rendering it useless. The Zande pulls out his Shotel and the two begin dueling. However, they end up losing their swords after a fall. The Zande pulls out his Makraka while the Persian pulls out his Sagaris. As they swing, the Zande manages to knock the Axe out of the Persian's hands. The Zande prepares to lay the finishing blow, but the Persian manages to recover his spear and smacks the Zande in the head with the counter end. He then thrusts the spear through the Zande's heart, killing him. The Persian recovers his Sagaris and goes on to take on the Samurai and Highlander. Meanwhile, The Samurai, using his Naginata faces the Highlander who fires at him with his English Longbow, leaving a large hole in the armor. The Samurai charges at the Highlander, who quickly grabs his Lochaber Axe. He cuts the Naginata and cuts it in half. The Samurai manages to pulls out his Kanabo, and swings, damaging the Axe. Before he can finish him off though, the Persian runs up him and hits him in the back. The Samurai turn and hits the Persian in the side, crippling him. The Persian pulls out his guard's dagger, and tries to runs up to the highlander, but the Scotsman has unsheathed his Claymore and he cuts the Persian's head off. The Samurai comes back armed with his Katana and they enter a sword fight, During which they lock swords. The Highlander breaks the lock and quickly slashes the Samurai across the face, leaving a scar. He gets the Samurai in a headlock and tries to stab him in the neck, but the Samurai breaks the Lock and throws the Highlander to the floor. He then pulls out his Tanto and stabs the Highlander in the neck, ending his life. The Samurai, badly injured, leaves the area to relax.
Expert's Opinion
The Samurai emerged victorious mainly due to his extreme skill and dediction to both long and close ranged combat, with his strong armor protecting him from most blows. The Highlander came in second because although his armor could stop many attacks, the precision of the Samurai was too much for him to keep up with. The Persian came in third place because his bronze armor was weaker than that of the Samurai and Highlander, and the Zande came last thanks to his lack of effective armor and lack of armor-piercing weaponry.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs. Dayak Headhunter (by Sport Shouting)
All of my votes were reeled in. Let's see who won!
5 Dayak Headhunters are hiding behind a tall plant. Through the plant, they see 3 Zandes sharpening their teeth while the other 2 sharpen their kpingas. 1 headhunter jumps out and fires his bow at a Zande. Zande- 4. The other Zandes yell "NYAM, NYAM!" and charge with makriggas and shields. The 2 spears clash and the makrigga goes through the Dayak. Headhunters- 4. The lead Zande runs back to camp while the other 2 charge after the Headhunter leader. The Zande leader fires a poison arrow at the lead headhunter but hits one of his own men. Zande-3. Disgusted, the Zande leader fires another shot, this time killing a headhunter. Headhunters-3. A Zande soldier passes by a a tree stump and hears breathing. He draws his kpinga. Then, a headhunter jumps out with his sword. The 2 weapons meet but the sword cuts through the Zande. Zande- 2. The headhunter goes back to the Zande camp for intel. But he finds a makraka in his back. Headhunters- 2. The lead headhunter fires a blowgun at a Zande but hits his shield. A kpinga throw skids off of the Dayak shield and a blowdart is now in the Zande. Zande- 1. The 2 leaders meet. The Zande leader draws his makraka and throws it at the headhunter. It misses so the Zande kicks the headhunter. Agitated, the headhunter picks up his sword but it's stolen by the Zande and he stabs it through the headhunter. Headhunters- 1 The other headhunter sees the kill and screams. Tears run down his cheek and he gets hit blowgun. He fires and the Zande takes a leg shot. Scared, the drops the gun and picks up the thrown makraka. Using each other's weapons, they fight. But the headhunter hits the Zande with the blowgun, retrieves the headhunter sword and cuts off the Zande's head. Zande-0. Victorious, the headhunter mumbles "I have done my duty" and trudges away. WINNER- Dayak Headhunters
Expert's Opinion
Please consider a contribution by writing an expert's opinion as to why the Dayak Headhunters won.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs. Apache (by Goddess of Despair)
The Apache rides his horse slowly through the forest. The sun began to set behind him as he heard a rustling of some nearby bushes. Acting quickly, the Apache abandoned his horse and ran behind a tree. Ducking down, he readied an arrow and took aim.
Out from the bush emerged the Zande. The Apache examined him. Considering the size of the Zande, he must have been a warrior. The Apache fired his arrow, which met the Zande’s shield, penetrating slightly.
The Apache prepared to fire again, however he couldn’t find another arrow, having used the rest earlier against a Comanche group. The Zande hurled his Kpinga at the Apache, who quickly ducked beneath it. The Apache ran back to his horse, as the Zande armed himself with a Makrigga.
Removing a Tomahawk and club from the saddle, the Apache turned and hurled the Tomahawk at the Zande, the blade getting stuck in the shield he carried. The Zande threw the shield to the ground and charged, whilst yelling “Nyum Nyum!”
The Apache waited and at the right moment he dodged to the left, making the Zande thrust his spear into the horse. Before the African could react, the Apache slammed the pole with his Club, snapping it. Smiling, the Apache followed it up with a kick to the chest, making the Zande stumble back words.
Angered, the Zande turned and grabbed his Makraka off the ground as the Apache charged. The two weapons collided, the War club being split in two. The Apache delivered a swift kick to the Zande’s knee, and then drew his knife.
The Zande swung his Makraka but the Apache side stepped and slashed his arm. With a war cry, the Apache tackled the Zande, plunging his knife into the man’s chest. Tearing out his bloodied knife, the Apache brought the eapon to the Zande’s forehead and sliced off the flesh. Holding the scalp in the air, the Apache gave one last war cry in victory.
Expert's Opinion
While the Zande Warrior dominated up close, he really was hindered at long range. The Apache can fight well on all ranges, although inferior up close he can still rain death with arrows. The Zande is intimidating with his sharpened teeth, but the Apache has the better training and marksmenship. Overall the Zande just couldn't keep up at long range, which is why he lost.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs Comanche (by TehSpartan)
A Zande is prowling a windswept plane looking for targets. Meanwhile a Comanche has set a temporary camp and is feeding his horse. The Zande stumples apon the Comanche's camp and fires a shot from his Boto. The arrow goes wide and strikes the horse right in the eye. Enraged at the death of his friend the Comanche raises his bow and fires a shot that lands right next to the Zande. The Comanche fires another shot that pierces the Zandes lower leg. The Zande screams in pain drops his Boto and hobbles away to grab his Makrigga, Makraka, and Kpiga. The Comanche drops the bow and grabs the remainder of his weapons to follow in pursuit.
The Zande retrives his weapons from a nearby tree but sees the Comanche charging him with the War Lance. The Zande tosses his Kpinga at the Comanche and it opens a large gash on his cheek. however the Comanche does not break stride and closes the distance quickly. The Zande arms his Makrigga and stabs at the Comanche however the Comanche deflects the attack with his war land . The two warriors clach spears repeatedly until the spears cross and penatrate both fighters stomachs. The Zande reels and pulls out his Makraka and the Comanche pulls out his War Hawk Club. The Comanche swings but the Zande jumps back to dodge. The Zande quickly lashes out with his Makraka but the Comanche duck. He then lashes out with his club atthe Zande's injured leg and shattered it send the Zande to the ground. The Comanche then leaps onto the Zande and starts bashing him with his club. The Zande cannot last under this repeated attack and looses conciousness. The Comanche then pulls out his Scalping Knife and scalps the Zande. The Comanche reaches down towards the Zande with his knife and slits the Zande's throat. His enemy defeated the Comanche raises the Zande's scalp and gives out a victory cry. He then begins a long trek. Without his horse it's going to be a long walk back to his village.
Expert's Opinion
The two warriors were evenly matched in close range but it was the superiority of the Comanche's bow as well as his skill with it that got him the win.
To see the original battle, weapons and votes, click here.
Battle vs Celt (by BattleGames1)
No battle will be written unforturnately
Winner: Celt
Expert's Opinion
While the Zande as a warrior tribe lasted far longer than the Celtic warriors, they lacked the weaponry, defenses and experience to fend off against a foe that fought tougher opponents (namely the Romans among others) and possessed a far greater military prowess about them. If you think this battle is unfair in any way, shape or form, you can go ahead and do a rematch.
To see the original battle, weapons, and votes, click here.
Battle vs Spartan (by Deathblade 100)
TBW
Expert's Opinion
TBA